My Parents' 65th Wedding Anniversary

It was just the other day when my sister sent me a message, simply stating that our parents’ 65th wedding anniversary was coming soon. This kind of message shouldn’t surprise anyone who knows me—I don’t remember dates or numbers very well. Hell, I failed math.

I’m also a bit “across the pond,” I daresay, so I don’t really keep up with the comings and goings of friends and family back in Canada. Still, my sister’s “Hey, wake up, dumb-dumb!” message came through loud and clear.

It immediately set my sluggish, coffee-deprived brain into motion that morning. I didn’t know exactly why 65 years was important; it obviously held some significance, or she wouldn’t have written the number. That mystery was promptly shelved on the never-ending “to-do list” in my brain.

But what really struck me about her brief message was the sheer weight of that number.

Sixty-five!

Has it been that long? Wow. I’m shocked. Sixty-five years for a couple to be together is just staggering. Guinness-like!

Don’t get me wrong—when we stand at the altar and say “I do,” which I’m sure was the custom back then, or the revised “I will,” or some future version like “I, who identify myself with the pronouns he/him, and on some weekends he/she shall try …,” we hope—or at least expect—to stay with our partner for life. But let’s face it: that rarely happens, and certainly not for this long.

Sadly, we live in an age of impermanence. Everything has to be said or done with speed and instant gratification—probably why most people don’t bother reading my long-winded articles.

Sixty-five years, though!

You know, my daughter can’t even get through a YouTube video without switching to something else in under a minute. Donald Trump changes his proposals faster than that even.

When you think about it, it’s likely that the average couple today might divorce at least once—or not even bother to get married—because of this impermanent state of mind we’re all in. It’s just easier to give up, throw in the towel, and move on. It’s so easy to find a partner online, too.

“So, you can belch-out the ABC’s? How quaint. Next!”

The Dutch-Oven routine is now grounds for an immediate cancellation. Never heard the end of that one.

Or another example of a couple nowadays would be, “What?! You don’t have a 5 digit salary? Yea, I don’t think so. Don’t slam the door when you leave”

Back in the day, I remember having those epically long “talk-a-thons” with my exes. You know, the ones that went on so long your parents would threaten to disconnect the phone line? Those don’t exist today.

At home now, you don’t even have to talk anymore. Just press the right emoji, and you’ve conveyed everything.

“Oh! Too many emojis. Or worse… You used the wrong emoji! Time for a divorce!”

But my parents? I bet they still use the old-fashioned way of communicating. Talking things out. Or shouting—which, let’s face it, is inevitable when they’re in different rooms and can’t hear each other anyway.

Somehow, life carries on.

Impermanence is just where we are now. It’s not necessarily wrong. But reflecting on that brings me back to this milestone number: 65.

Sixty-five years these two people have shared their lives together. Through recessions, job losses, quirky neighbors, COVID, a cranky “Don’t talk to me in the morning, or you’ll die!” daughter (ahem), and a wayward son (ahem) who gave them a heart attack when the police came knocking… they’ve endured. Carry on.

They’ve also faced hardships that cut deeply—none more so than the loss of loved ones whose absence we still feel profoundly today. I am sure those loved ones look down upon you with pride.

Oh, and of course, in all those 65 years, the Maple Leafs still haven’t won the Stanley Cup. That’s a whole lifetime of waiting, folks—just putting things into perspective.

Undoubtedly, they’ve also had countless moments of joy: attending weddings in our now huge family and earning the esteemed title of ‘GREAT GRANDPARENTS’—without the extra babysitting duties, of course. Trips across the world. Hey, I heard North Korea is looking for tourists recently.

Through it all, they’ve embraced each other’s quirks! Honestly, tripping and falling more often than not to get my wife’s daily ‘#!@#&!’ deliveries from the courier takes a toll. “One more package…”, as Ralph Kramden would say, “To the moon, Alice!” (Barbaric and non-PC by today’s standards, so I’ll settle for an angry emoji + moon + double exclamation marks.)

Let’s ask my parents the question directly now. What is the secret bond that helps you endure for 65 years?

Is it love? Friendship? The soul mate phenomenon? Is it all of those damn mason jars full of marbles? Or maybe… just maybe… it’s some kind of magical superglue binding you through the thick and thin.

We younger generations want to know—though we’d probably need an emoji decoder to decipher the secret.

When we see the two of you, we see a united pair. Strong and enviable, “like tank in ball pit” (said in a Russian accent). Longer lasting than even the copper-top battery.

It’s truly amazing and wonderful.

Oh, by the way, I eventually got around to looking it up: 65 years marks the Blue Sapphire Wedding Anniversary. Apparently, you might even get a nod from the head of state for your fortitude and perseverance. According to Copilot, the Queen herself might show up! (Let’s hope not—brrr.)

And here’s a word of caution: avoid travelling in the U.S. for now—you might get tariffed for having such a rare mineral moniker.

Let’s wrap up my meandering diatribe with these thoughts:

1. You deserve to be applauded, even by Doug Ford (our “drama-Queen”), for being role models, showcasing the potential of an enduring marriage to us youngins’.
2. We thank you both for staying strong and inspiring us.
3. Lastly, but importantly, we celebrate the superglue that’s long outlasted its expiry date (though I suspect the Twinkie might outlast us all in the end).

We love you both and wish you many more happy years ahead!